Visual Rewrite – mrmba1

Monster: 30 | Fatherhood Involvement | Ad Council

0:01

The ad begins with a dad hard at work on his laptop with files pulled up on his screen. He appears to be in a home, with a child’s pink bike against the stars and children’s artwork behind him, as well as a children’s art station next to him. It can be concluded from this that he is working from home. His desk and work space is quite cluttered, but in a good way. There are craft supplies, pictures, and paintings surrounding his work space so it can be deduced that he has a good relationship with his child. In the background, there are several pictures with him hugging and kissing his little girl, as well as a painting of a monster attacking someone in bed with “Papa” being there to save the day. All of this is on a board amongst his own work, so it can be seen that he has a good balance between work and spending time with his daughter. Although not confirmed, there does not appear to be a wife in any of the pictures, so it can be possibly be assumed that he is a single father raising his only daughter, while also doing work in able to make money and take care of her.

This environment, even in the first second, was chosen to let the audience understand the type of connection that he has with his daughter. Even though no actions were taken yet, with all of the artwork and selfies of the two pinned to a board right alongside his work, the dedication and the connection that this father has is crystal clear.

0:02

He looks up from his laptop in a quick, startled way towards the ceiling, stopping his work completely, with a worried look that turns to understanding following the initial shock, almost as if this type of noise is regular or familiar. His daughter must be upstairs trying to sleep and having nightmares, as foreshadowed by the monster painting seen at the 0:01 mark. Since the father seems to understand what’s going on, we can presume that this is a somewhat regular occurrence and that father knows what he has to do to comfort his little girl.

0:05-0:15

Hearing that his daughter is upset, he stops what he’s doing, closes his laptop, and heads upstairs before quickly grabbing his laptop to bring with him. As the camera slowly zooms into the monster painting on the back cork board, we can more clearly see that the father is protecting his daughter from a scary monster while she is in bed, as she labeled the two people as “Papa” and “Me.”

0:16

The camera is zoomed in on a little girl, sound asleep in her bed. This makes us wonder what the father was hearing if she’s asleep.

0:20-0:25

As the camera pans downward, we see the father laying underneath his daughter’s bed, presumably fending off the monsters from the previous painting that have infiltrated her room and are trying to scare her. He has his laptop open and is continuing his work, while also staying with and comforting his daughter enough to where she can soundly sleep. If the first second didn’t convey a healthy work/ family balance, this scene definitely does. He doesn’t ignore her to continue his work and doesn’t simply forget about his work. He balances both perfectly showing that he truly loves his daughter. The words “Never stop being a dad” appear on screen, emphasizing and confirming the points that we’ve witnessed so far. This is followed by the hashtag “Dadication,” displaying the importance of fathers being dedicated to raising their children.

Being the main actions of the sequence, what the father chooses to do solidifies the idea that he is great at balancing his life. This is a great display of dedication, and the choice by the director to include this and make this the focal point of the ad was genius. Through the simple action of laying under his daughter’s bed while continuing his work, we as the audience can clearly understand how much he loves and cares for his daughter. He’s not afraid of multitasking if it means comforting his child, and isn’t consumed by work as most fathers seem to be. This drives home the importance of fatherhood and is a perfect example of how even a simple action can be so important and comforting for a child.

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3 Responses to Visual Rewrite – mrmba1

  1. davidbdale says:

    MrMBA, because you did not request Feedback, I will provide you a quick provisional grade and about 15 minutes worth of time to suggest ways you should revise your work to improve that grade.

    The next step would be for you to respond to that feedback. Then make revisions to this post and request a Regrade. If you wish further feedback on this post, you will have to ask specific questions.

    Like

  2. davidbdale says:

    I must compliment you on your analysis, MBA. You’ve done a beautiful job of describing the conclusions the director helped you achieve in just a brief video. Mentioning, for example, that there’s no mother in the pictures and concluding not only that that was deliberate but that it also suggested Dad was doing the parenting solo is impressive.

    I haven’t watched the video, so I have to trust that your conclusions are accurate.

    I do wonder why there’s so little actual description of the visual elements that helped you draw some conclusions. How do we know Dad’s fighting a monster, for example? When you say it’s a painting, should we know somehow it’s a child’s painting? Is there an explanation for why Dad looked upstairs if it wasn’t because his daughter was making noise?

    I’ve used up my time. See your grade on Canvas. Follow the procedure in the first Reply.

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  3. davidbdale says:

    Probably could still benefit from a bit of work from 05 to 16.
    Post has been Regraded.

    Like

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