Rebuttal Rewrite-person345

The Truth About Travel

Over the course of time, we have seen that going on a vacation is a healthy way for people to enjoy themselves and to escape their busy lives at home. It helps relieve stress and anxiety and overall, going on a vacation and travelling relaxes the mind and the body as shown in the Stages of Travel. However, it is obvious that travelling and going on a vacation also leads to some risks and other negative effects. Traveling in moderation is healthy, but it when we travel constantly in a short period of time is then these negative effects take hold.

When someone travels through multiple time zones in one flight, they experience what is called “Travel Fatigue.” An article titled, “The Stresses of Travel” by J Waterhouse, T Reilly, and B Edwards explains this. Travel fatigue can be caused by multiple factors. according to the article, Travel Fatigue is “Long-distance travel is associated with a group of transient negative effects, collectively referred to as ‘travel fatigue,’ which result from anxiety about the journey, the change to an individual’s daily routine, and dehydration due to time spent in the dry air of the aircraft cabin.”

For many people, travel is an escape from their daily routines and to enjoy themselves. When we travel, we feel exhilarated and excited to get to our destination. This positive disruptive change in our routine is healthy and benefits our mental health. It helps us escape the stress and anxiety of our regular lives. Going on a vacation and anticipating it blocks out many of the negatives of travel including Travel fatigue and others fears.

Many people also experience Jet Lag when crossing over many time zones. This impacts sleep because time is different across time zones. Jet Lag makes traveler sleep deprived since they cannot get enough sleep. People’s sleep schedules are messed up because of the time zone changes. In this sense, travelling constantly and crossing many different time zones wears down the body and the mind. Most of the time, travelling increases happiness and lowers anxiety and depression since they are escaping from all they hardships they are facing. Yeah, people may be always on the move and getting less than they are used to, but the benefits of travel outweigh even the slightest of negatives. Traveling is essential to both physical and mental health.

Another viewpoint that someone may take concerning travel is the rising chance of terrorism. Traveling anywhere in the world has its risks. An Article titled, “Tourism and the Globalization of Fear: Analyzing the Politics of Risk and (in)Security in Global Travel” written by Raoul Bianchi in 2006 expands upon this idea even further. Bianchi is a senior research fellow in the at the International Institute of Culture Terrorism and Development at London Metropolitan University. ” When people travel to places either nationally or internationally, there is chance of risks in security and terrorist attacks.  In the article, Bianchi adds,” Tourists have increasingly become the specific target of ‘terrorist violence’”. This statement leads to the idea that travelling does in fact lead to more violence because terrorists in foreign nations are constantly targeting tourists from the United States and Europe as well. In these scenarios, it is safe to say that not being travel deprived increases violence but by terrorist groups not by the tourists themselves. It would be foolish to live in fear of violence for the rest of our lives. Violence will be a part of society forever and there is no real way around it. Travel benefits all and it makes people visit cool places to escape the stresses of their lives.

Lockdowns have made us anxious and unrestricted travel makes us fearful because of potential terrorist attacks. This is seen during the Covid Pandemic. We are anxious and depressed because we were not allowed to travel due to travel restrictions. As the time went on with the restrictions still in place, society shifted the blame towards others such as their governments and people.  When we are deprived of something, we feel trapped and seek a way forward.  The January 6th riots at the United States capital and the shootings of Asian Americans in Atlanta are the most recent examples. Americans at the capital stormed the building to overturn Joe Biden’s presidency. They felt threatened by Biden winning the election. Americans are targeting Asian Americans to blame China for the spread of the Coronavirus and other events. Those two events are the most damaging events we have seen due to governments depriving people their right to travel or go on a vacation. It is dangerous forcing people to stay home. From this past year, we have seen that slowing down travel has damaging effects on society. The benefit of allowing travel outweighs all dangers. Allowing travel runs the risk of getting killed or seriously injured in potential terrorist attacks. But not allowing people to travel sparks revolutions and even more violence. Placing limits does not make sense and is unreasonable.

References

  1. Bianchi, R. (2006). Tourism and the globalization of fear: Analyzing the politics of risk AND (IN)SECURITY in global travel – RAOUL Bianchi, 2006. Retrieved April 12, 2021, from https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1057/palgrave.thr.6050028
  2. Ettema, D., & Timmermans, H. (2006, October 27). Costs of travel time uncertainty and benefits of travel time information: Conceptual model and numerical examples. Retrieved April 12, 2021, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0968090X06000684
  3. Waterhouse, J., Reilly, T., & Edwards, B. (2011). The stress of travel. Retrieved April 12, 2021, from https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02640410400000264
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3 Responses to Rebuttal Rewrite-person345

  1. davidbdale says:

    This is a clever approach, Person, concentrating on the not-often-acknowledged dangers of travel. I’m not sure readers would have them in mind as you try to convince them of the dangers of being DENIED travel, so the Rebuttal approach was not obvious. I congratulate you on working it out.

    Your paragraphs are too long. Ask yourself if they represent one main idea or several. Produce a paragraph for each main idea. Doing so may help you see which are well-developed and which are not.

    P1.I appreciate that you want to identify “critics of travel,” but they’re pretty much a nonexistent class. Maybe just suggest that there are obviously dangers to travel that have to be factored against the advantages.

    P2. Obviously this paragraph covers two main ideas, perhaps more, but clearly two. Watch out for your punctuation. It’s messy here. Periods go INSIDE the quotation marks. Somehow your quotations BEGIN with CLOSE QUOTES. And the SINGLE QUOTES inside the DOUBLE QUOTES are the right idea, but not perfectly executed either. Ask for help if you need it.

    P2. It might be useful to compare the small negative effects of travel fatigue with the small beneficial benefits of what you might call Travel Exhilaration, or something similar. Anxiety about the journey parallels the excitement of anticipating a journey, right? The disruptive change in daily routine is exactly what we’re looking for from travel when we phrase it as “an escape from daily routine.” See what I mean? The FLIP SIDE of the positives.

    P2. You attempt to make that comparison in your discussion of Jet Lag, but, as we discussed in my class lecture about the value of Naming your Terms (the greens of Ireland, the astronomical constellations), you don’t clearly identify whatever the opposite of Jet Lag might be.

    P3. Your paragraph again names very obviously two main ideas, perhaps more but develops only one. Your first sentence names the two topics. You stretch your single observation that travel exposes travelers to the chance of terrorism into a couple hundred words, Person. I think we can agree most of them are filler. There’s SO MUCH to say about the risks of international travel if you want to develop this idea thoroughly. You drop the term “economic risks” into your argument and then neglect it completely.

    P4. You surrender the power of your claims with weak sentences all the way through this paragraph. Some examples.

    While it is true that potential terrorist attacks can make people afraid and anxious about traveling, it is also true that depriving people of travel can bring on these affects as well because they are not able to go on a vacation. This is seen during the Covid Pandemic. We are anxious and depressed because we were not allowed to travel due to travel restrictions.

    —While LOCKDOWNS have made us fearful, and confinement makes us anxious, unrestricted travel THREATENS us with actual TERRORIST ATTACKS.
    —Is there anything missing from that robust summary?

    As the time went on with the restrictions still in place, society shifted the blame towards others such as their governments and people. The January 6th riots at the United States capital and the shootings of Asian Americans in Atlanta are the most recent examples. Those two events are the most damaging events we have seen due to governments depriving people their right to travel or go on a vacation. Because of these events, it is dangerous forcing people to stay home.

    —People in danger, trapped and threatened, will often SCAPEGOAT someone for their problems. Americans who blamed China ATTACKED and even KILLED random Asian Americans. Americans who BLAMED the government for failing to protect them, STORMED the Capitol.
    —See the value of very specific claims and robust verbs?
    —Work that out for yourself on the last few sentences.

    The rest of your paragraphs could benefit from similar revisions.

    Like

  2. davidbdale says:

    Post has been Regraded.

    Like

  3. davidbdale says:

    Fix this:
    of ‘terrorist ’violence”.

    Like

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