Visual Rewrite – iwantpopsicle

(0:00-0:02)The video begins with a close up shot of an old woman’s face. Her facial expression seems almost disapproving or sad. The background is blurred 

(0:02-0:03)There is a picture of a woman and what is presumably her children. There is a dark brown wooden wall in the background. She is wearing glasses and is holding the two kids on her lap on a couch. One of the children is a girl with a small floral, white, dress. The other child is a boy and his body is blocked by a radio, so it isn’t visible. There is a blurry picture of half of a baby’s face in the bottom right corner of the shot in a separate picture frame. There is a flower on the table to the left of the center picture frame.

(0:04-0:05)The camera is peeking around the corner into the old woman’s kitchen. You can see one of her cabinets in the top right corner of the shot, with some fine china on the shelf of it. She has a flying dove hanging from the wall to the right of her. She is looking out her window as if she was looking for or waiting for someone. She has her hand on the wall out of shot as she is doing this.

(0:06-0:08)There is a drawing on the old woman’s fridge that reads “We miss you Grandma.” This reveals that she is a grandmother. There is a photograph taped to the top and bottom left corners of the drawing. They are pictures of her grandchildren. One being a girl, and one being a boy. They resemble the kids in the beginning of the video. There is a heart drawn on the right of the drawing, and under it there are two children drawn wearing masks. It seems that the kids mailed this drawing with the photos to their grandmother and she hung it up on the fridge. On the other side of the fridge, there is a photograph of the children hanging from a bar on the playground.

(0:08-0:11)The grandmother is now holding a pencil, sitting at a table in her kitchen. She turns her head towards the camera and starts to smile. The shot cuts to her open front door, with the woman and children in the photographs standing in the door frame. The little girl is standing in the front, while the woman holds the boy. The three of them are smiling and looking into the house. The woman is holding her purse in her free arm, and has a blue jacket on. 

(0:11-0:17)The woman is now at the door, and she smiles at the little girl before she runs into her grandmother’s arms. The little boy runs in after her and they both leap into their grandmother’s arms. With the boy on the left and the girl on the right, the grandmother can be seen smothered in between them, smiling very wide. The women is still standing in the door frame, with her hands held together slightly above her heart as she smiles and watches the grandmother embrace her grandchildren. The woman has a hand on her shoulder, but whoever is touching her is unseen in the shot. 

(0:17-0:30)The man holding the woman’s shoulder begins to walk into the house holding a tupperware container with a red lid. It has some kind of food in it. This is probably a gift for the grandmother. He moves past the woman and sets the book bag he was carrying on the floor. The woman continues to watch the grandmother embrace her grandchildren. The man and the woman appear to be the children’s parents. A message on the screen reads “The COVID-19 vaccines are here. Soon this day will be too.” The children are now looking at their grandmother and the 3 appear to be happily talking up a storm to each other. The man walks back into the door frame where the woman is standing as the video ends.

This entry was posted in iwantpopsicle, Portfolio IWantPopsicle, Visual Rewrite. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Visual Rewrite – iwantpopsicle

  1. davidbdale says:

    Pop, because you did not request Feedback, I will provide you a quick provisional grade and about 15 minutes worth of time to suggest ways you should revise your work to improve that grade.

    The next step would be for you to respond to that feedback. Then make revisions to this post and request a Regrade. If you wish further feedback on this post, you will have to ask specific questions.


  2. davidbdale says:

    Hey, Pop. I’ve read your first three entries. I haven’t watched the video. I get the impression of a lonely woman reminiscing about when her kids (and she) were younger, now she lives alone, and she looks out the window longingly, not exactly anticipating that they’ll arrive, but always hopeful for a visit.

    Is that accurate? If so, you should be including that mood, that sense you get while watching the first few seconds, that eery way you can draw conclusions from just a few images. Don’t wait until the end of the video to share with us what you’re getting from what you’re watching.

    I’ve read three more sections. So there WAS a visit to anticipate. How did I get that impression from just your description of the details of the first few seconds? This is the job. Analyzing how we draw these conclusions. What’s the evidence? How does it contribute to the argument? How effective is it?

    Sweet reunion. What’s the purpose of the video? Is it meant to encourage vaccination? How effective is it? Don’t forget the RHETORIC half of the assignment.

    I’ve used up my time. See your grade on Canvas. Follow the procedure in the first Reply.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s